Wednesday, 30 March 2011

It's you... The Liebster Awards

It's You....Liebster Award

I'm extremely touched and honoured to have been awarded the esteemed Liebster Award by two bloggers I very much admire (even more so now, mwah ha) the hilarious Domestic Anarchist and the gorgeously talented and stylish Elle and Belle.   I also have to confess to being a complete ingrate as I got this last week and it's taken me an age to post.  Bet you wouldn't catch Colin Firth keeping the Academy Awards waiting in such a fashion...
The Liebster Blog Award is aimed at us 'little' blogster's who have less than 300 followers, as a bit of love sharing :)




There's are a few simples rules to follow:
  1. Post displaying the award, linking back to the person who awarded you (see above!)
  2. Choose your own blog picks (below) and let them know they're awarded (that'll take a while).
  3. Hope everyone discovers some new favourites.
  4. Revel in some blog love. 
So here are my Liebster winners, 2011!


Jennie (Edspire - William and Esther)
Ghostwritermummy
Tattie Weasel

The Gallery - Hair chameleon

So The Gallery theme is "hair" this week. That makes me an expert! I am the hair chameleon. I have had no end of styles, colours, lengths over the years. Here are a small selection:

Brunette. Similar to now except it's perhaps a little lighter, and longer.


Red. Very red. I had it like this for much of my maternity year after deciding I wanted to be blonde no longer.

Blonde, with brunette underneath. Remember when that was trendy?

Short. Trying to get blonde again after a male hairdresser at a trendy salon chopped it all off and dyed it black and pillar box red. Hated it.


Gothic black. I liked it better when it was long and black and I have some great (and scary) photos, but alas no scanner, so this is the best I can do (thanks to my old mate who uploaded this unflattering shot :) )
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I would have also been able to provide perms, had I access to photos from my school days *shudder* Another time, perhaps!

Now go and chuckle at some of the other gems at:

I'll Never Be a Sharapova

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Uploaded with ImageShack.us

It started with a yawn-inducing conversation with OH before he went to work this morning. Well, I say conversation, it was pretty much one sided as he launched into a statistical analysis of his current Kill to Death Ratio on his latest X-Box game of choice, Homefront. If you know of the Call of Duty franchise then you know the type of thing - grown men running around pretending to be Rambo. Except that they're not running around, they are sat boggle-eyed in front of the goggle-box for hours at a time (if you let them) looking ridiculous with a little controller in their hands and a Britney-style headset so that they can coordinate their team efforts to thrash the enemy ; or more accurately, have monosyllabic conversations with their friends who are also online with them, whilst rising to the bait of the 11 year old boys also online and shouting obscenities. Seriously, what kind of parent lets their kids play these games? That aside, my OH is an intelligent man with a professional job but this apparently passes for leisure. Harumph!

So anyway, I'm yawning and U-huh'ing while he's prattling on about how it would really help his game if he had this £300 set of headphones (what? That's more than I just spent on our deluxe Baby Jogger buggy!) and he then comes out with "I'm really supportive of all your charity work and blogging, can't you be more supportive of my kill death ratio?" Now I knew he was being completely tongue in cheek but I was narky, had only just got up after a rubbish night's sleep, and was steeling myself for the first nappy change of the day, which is always the worst as I'd place bets that my Babyzoid will produce a bigger volume of pasty poop than your child, first thing. This is all part of her morning ritual. She wakes up - late, 8.30am-9.30am usually, switches on her cot music, sings and gurgles to herself for a while, before having the biggest crap an elephant would be proud of. Only THEN does she demand to get up. A late riser. I'm so lucky, except for the giant cowpat part.

Anyway, I was mentally digressing from the scintillating KDR convo (damnit, I'm picking up the lingo!) in the same way I am now when he says:

"But I guess you don't have the pressure of league tables with your blogging".

"Oh really?" I say, "Haven't you heard of Tots 100? It tells me that I'm 347th (or thereabouts) in the league table of British Mummy Bloggers!"

"That's fantastic!" he says, "you're the equivalent of Anne Keothavong. That's it! You're a female British tennis player. You're number one in this household but on a world stage you're not even in the top 100. We need to get you trained up, we need to strategise. You WILL join the Sharapovas and the Williams. You need, the English graduate of the house, on board. I WILL raise you up so you can stand on mountains! "

"You mean I'm going to be up there with Sticky Fingers and Nickie at Typecast?"

"Um...yeah! You're going to the top, baby!"

"But I'm happy with my 347 - I climbed 300 places last month. That'll do me nicely."

"*sigh* And that's why you're never going to be Sharapova. You're always going to be the plucky Brit who's good, but not good enough... Anyway, back to those headphones..."

Ok, that might have been embellished a little, but believe it or not a version of that conversation did actually take place this morning, tennis player metaphors and all. Do I care about ratings? Not really. Of course I want my blog to be read and I do feel more than a little delight if I get high viewing numbers for a particular post and comments to go with, but do I have to be the biggest and the best at everything? Not since junior school when I'd spend all year psyching myself up for the 100 metre sprint but then choke on the big day and come in second after being the fastest all year. Yeah, guess I always was the female Andy Murray... So why stress? I like to take life a little easier these days. And being 347th on the Tots 100 is A-OK by me as long as I remain number 1 in my own little universe.

Tuesday, 29 March 2011

Movie Meme: Week 6 - Chick Flicks

Eager to redeem myself after not managing to join in last week I excitedly headed over to Metal Mummy's this morning to find....oh. Chick Flicks. Um... urgh. Thing is I've seen so many of them as I live with the Rom Com King. Nothing makes OH happier than a frantic chase to the airport followed by the cheesy Hollywood ending. And after every single film, no matter how pukesome, he pronounces "that was the best film ever!" to which I then start teasing him mercilessly about his 'rom-com face'. His Dad's the same so it seems to be a bizarre trait that runs like liquid saccharine through the male bloodline. I find it odd, but kind of cute. Indeed I've known about his 'weakness' since before we met (Internet romance!) as I lent him the terribly sad Life is Beautiful and he lent me Say Anything.

These days we make deals - I'll watch a Rom-com with him if he will then watch some thriller or gangster flick with me. And from his end it has to be a Rom com - anything without the typical Hollywood ending (*cough* Notebook) is NOT appreciated. Indeed his visible crumple and sobbing after said film has since been a source of coy shame for him and amusement for me as I demand he gives up a man card.

So... can you tell I'm doing everything I can here to avoid choosing an actual chick flick? OK, so here it is. Far from the best film I've ever seen but it's the first we watched together - well on DVD anyway - I'd already made him go and see Kill Bill 2, mwah ha ha.

Serendipity


It's basically fate and the course of true love yadda yadda ya. It's got a cute John Cusack in it, a dreadfully wooden Kate Beckinsale, but it works. OK, Kate ain't too bad.... in this. When we watched it we were still living a distance away from each other. After we saw it we kept having our own fate-like occurrences. We heard an obscure Nick Drake song from the soundtrack in a Thai restaurant; we found a shop called Serendipity; amongst lots of other things relating to our past conversations and courtship that I won't go into. So not the best film from far from the best genre - but special to us.

Thank goodness that's over with. Now check out the rest over at Metal Mummy's:



Friday, 25 March 2011

Bliss Activist: My Visit to Leicester Royal's New Neonatal Unit

This morning has been full of action.  I dropped little 'un off at nursery - a 42 mile round trip!  Then I drove to Leicester's Royal Infirmary to meet with the Neonatal unit's lead consultant.  We started with an informal chat about what I was doing for Bliss before getting into the nitty-gritty of the current situation faced by Leicester and other hospitals in the midst of the budget cuts to public services, including the NHS.

The unit at the Leicester Royal is in quite a fortunate position having recently opened a new unit, which is currently offering the same cot capacity but has the capability to offer more.  As with everything it comes down to money.  The new cots are for the most part already in place in a room full of impressive high tech medical equipment, but at present they do not have enough nurses to staff it.  This would require extra funding, which at present is hard to come by.  My consultant contact admitted that like the majority of hospitals in the country, they do not meet the recommended nurse to baby ratios that The NHS and Department of Health decided on in their 2003 report: Toolkit for High Quality Neonatal Services.

Even if extra funding were to become available, there is a national shortage of qualified Neonatal nurses.  It takes approximately 5 years to become fully qualified in neonatal care which means that there is no quick fix to hiring new or even replacing old staff.  In the past hospitals have run recruitment drives oversees, and indeed Leicester Royal benefited from recruiting a number of excellent nurses from the Philippines and would ideally look to do this again if they manage to secure the funding to staff the extra rooms that are sat waiting.  However, hospitals face extra pressures due to the new immigration caps that the Coalition Government agreed at the end of last year.  Having been set at 21,700 skilled workers, this represents a cut of 6,300 on the equivalent figure for 2009 Source: BBC.  This is a real threat to the future staffing levels within neonatal care and it is difficult to see what can be done about it.  That is why charities such as Bliss (see link below) are so important in raising the profile of the needs of sick and premature babies and acting as a pressure group of sorts to persuade the government to honour commitments already made.

Currently the country's hospitals are run on a network system, which means that should you give birth to a baby who needs to be transferred, there will be a network of hospitals within a geographical area that have formal lines of communication.  Practically, for me this meant that when I gave birth at the George Eliot (who do not have full intensive care facilities) I stood a very good chance of being transferred to a hospital within the network.  Indeed my baby was transferred to Northampton, which although 39 miles from my home, was far preferable to being transferred out of the Midlands altogether. 

Leicester's Head Consultant confirmed that this system works very well and it would be unthinkable to return to the days pre-2003 where nurses could spend hours phoning around the country's hospital's hoping to get lucky in finding a spare cot.  That still happens as capacity within every hospital is a major issue, but it occurs much less than it used to.

There were other issues that we discussed, such as in-unit provision of other necessary medical personnel, for instance specialist dietitians, physiotherapists and pharmacists - as well as parent accommodation.  But I'll deal with these on another occasion, after all, I have gladly committed to at least of year of Bliss campaigning.  My career as a volunteer activist is only just beginning, and there is a long road ahead for the whole campaign team in securing from politicians what sick and premature babies desperately need.  It's not simply about maintaining current agreements and budgets, but arguing the case for better provision all around in every aspect of neonatal care.  That will of course take extra money that can't be given to other worthy public services, but every cause must argue its case in the dog-eat-dog climate of budgetary slashing.  The politicians argue that funding is still actually rising for the NHS, but the reality is that front line jobs are in danger (Guardian data) and the estimated loss to nursing and other front line non-admin staff is worrying indeed.

Back to my visit, I was extremely impressed with what I saw at the Leicester Royal.  Once I had gotten over the personal shock of hearing those darned monitors again, and of course seeing the incubated babies that were as tiny as my Charlotte had been, I was able to appreciate how the hospital has done its utmost to make the babies and parents as comfortable as possible - extremely important at such a traumatic and stressful time.  The staff look every bit as committed to their duties as those who looked after my baby and I back in 2009; and the unit itself is bright, clean, modern, and excellently designed from an architectural point of view.  They have really thought about the needs of not only the babies themselves, but of staff and parents also.  The parents room is comfortable, nicely decorated and has good facilities.  There are 3 large refrigerators in a designated breast milk kitchen, and the expressing room is arranged so that mothers can have privacy or chat to each other, at what many mothers will possibly agree is the most tedious part of caring for a breastfed baby who cannot yet latch on.  There are also rooms for parents to sleep in, though not nearly enough for the units capacity.  There are plans to build a designated hotel of sorts, but again this requires funding. 

The part of the tour which really broke my heart though was seeing the quiet rooms where babies who are about to die can do so in dignity, surrounded by their parents and loved ones.  My host explained to me that for him this was one of the most important aspects of the redesign.  He wanted somewhere which wasn't going to add to the distress and misery for the parents at such a tragic time.  He explained that there shouldn't really be curtains, but there was.  That the pictures on the wall had been specially selected.  That there was an en suite facility so that the parents didn't have to contend with moving away from their baby who could die at any time.  They had even made the walls double thickness to block out any outside noise so that parents would not be exposed to chatting or laughter of passing staff, parents or visitors.  As a parent you don't expect this level of care from the NHS, but wouldn't it be fantastic if every neonatal unit, and indeed hospital ward, were designed with such care?  It doesn't take a massive amount of money to add these small details, but it means everything to the parents who have so much to contend with.  But the main message of course has to be maintaining the network system and enabling adequate staffing levels, and from here we can ensure that unnecessary and avoidable risk to babies who are born too soon, too small, and too sick is stamped out.

Link: Bliss: For baby's born too soon, too small, too sick

Thursday, 24 March 2011

Action for protecting neonatal units against the cuts

Today I had the meeting with my local MP during his surgery. I can't really talk about the finer points of the conversation but he said he will get back to me regarding my concerns. You don't get long with your MP at these meetings and I really wanted to make sure I raised all the points I wanted addressed. So rather than go too much into my own personal history I left him with a typed A4 sheet which I have reproduced, complete with photos down below. I have also cheekily asked him to come with me to visit a major new Neonatal unit in our area, but he hasn't committed to do that either as yet.

After speaking to a lovely lady in charge of Press and Communications at the major neonatal hospital in our region, I've been invited to meet one of the consultants, who is also one of the UK neonatal programme directors. I am really excited about this and hope to get a much fuller picture of the challenges facing neonatal care in the UK in the current climate of the reorganisation and potential cuts to NHS services.

Here is the story I handed to my MP.

My story: The birth of Charlotte Elizabeth, born at 27 weeks gestation.

My daughter was born on the 11th September, 2009 at the George Eliot Hospital, Nuneaton, after I went into spontaneous labour. She weighed 2lb 5oz. During my pregnancy I had been very ill, but Charlotte had continued to grow and gone from strength to strength. I had done everything correctly: I don’t smoke, I abstained from alcohol, and I had a healthy diet. The reason I went into premature labour is unknown.



Charlotte needed ventilating and had to be transferred to Northampton General as she needed the highest level of care due to her extreme prematurity. At this stage she had two bleeds on the brain and a potential heart valve issue, which thankfully turned out to resolve itself.
Although the daily two-hour round-trip up and down the A5/M1 was difficult, I was extremely fortunate that thanks to the Neonatal network system introduced in 2003, my baby hadn’t been transferred much further afield. Northampton General was able to keep daily contact with all of my local hospitals so that Charlotte could be transferred once she was stable and an incubator was available.
This was an extremely trying time for our whole family, but we are so grateful to the excellent care we received both in Northampton and at the George Eliot. The units were regularly short-staffed and the nurses were often exhausted, yet they remained uncomplaining, professional and supportive to the last. I will never forget their kindness at such a difficult and stressful time.
Charlotte, now 18 months old, is now thriving and enjoys running rings round her father and I, as well as the nursery she attends.

In spite of the challenges parenting a premature baby presents, we are so thankful to have had such a happy outcome. We feel that protecting and improving the country’s neonatal services will ensure that the risks to sick and vulnerable babies are kept at a minimum.

Wednesday, 23 March 2011

The Gallery - Education: We need to talk about Babyzoid...


The theme at The Gallery this week is Education. I could publish a picture of myself in the classroom as snapped by a 6th former who cheekily nabbed my Blackberry from the desk when I wasn't looking (that'll teach me to have my phone out in class!) or a photo from my gawky school years. I've seen so many great ones of other blogger-friends already. But I've had a post in mind since last week about Babyzoid's start on the path to education. She joined a gorgeous countryside nursery in September for two days a week. The staff are great and the children are 'well-turned out', where all the parents apart from us get their shopping via Waitrose delivery. The nursery itself is pretty impressive with its own sizable allotments, playground and lawns, overlooking the beautiful Warwickshire countryside. And it serves a wonderfully varied menu where Babyzoid often whoops her way through lots of fresh fruit and delights such as moussaka (her favourite), chili con carne (no wonder the nappies post-nursery are gruesome) and bread and butter pudding, and yes, I'm envious. Indeed apart from a little separation anxiety on handover she has a lovely time. Here she is packing her Timmy nursery bag a day early:


Speaking of which, Babyzoid always seems to have had an affinity with that roguish little lamb. Timmy Time was the first programme that she took any notice of. She now giggles and makes baaaahing sounds at the theme tune and chuckles with delight when Timmy does anything mischievous - an evil 'ahhh, that looks like a super next trick for my armoury' type of chuckle that lets us know we're in for some mischief in the next half hour. Indeed so into Timmy was she that before she could even roll over I took Babyzoid to meet him when he visited our Town centre:


Last week when I picked Babyzoid up from nursery her favourite nursery assistant told me how clever she thought my little angel was. Never content with just sitting and playing with a toy she has to know how it works. She's already learned how to open the toy box clasps, which means she can throw the contents around the room; and the stair gate has to be double latched as that has been figured out too. Even at home door handles are no problem, even if they take her a while and until I attached a stair gate she could often be found shooting out into the hallway - heading for the stairs or the kitchen. Back at nursery she naturally finishes her food before anyone else and waits until backs are turned before making her way round the table with her spoon to steal the other kids dinners. She also needs tabs kept on her outside as while the other kids are happily playing or snoozing on the lawn, Babyzoid dives straight for the flower beds causing destruction to the previously beautiful display of marigolds and daffodils. Despite all of this my little terror seems to have charmed the staff, though sometimes I notice that they are very quick to have her ready as soon as they see me coming up the drive.

I can see the school parents evenings stretching out ahead of me already. "Mrs Zoid, your daughter is a bright child when she applies herself, but her wilful tendencies and lack of concentration need to be addressed if she is to achieve her full potential". All in all, as I look to the future and dread the inevitable summons to the headmasters office, I think this photograph pretty much sums up the battles I will have on my hands:





Friday, 18 March 2011

Flashback Friday - The cheeks have it!

After being told repeatedly over the last 18 months how much my daughter looks the spitting image of her father, I thought I'd put up a photo of me as a baby, followed by Babyzoid as a baby and see what you think (yes so I've deliberately chosen the one I think looks most like mine!) In the interests of neutrality I would have posted one of Daddyzoid too, but alas I do not have one (yet) in digital form.



Don't be swayed by my title (there must be hamster in the family geneology), what do you think?

Hey hey yippedy yay - I got 3 reason's to be chipper today!

Yeah I was singing my title to the tune of CBeebie's 'Guess With Jess' theme ... *wince*

Well, this week I actually do feel pretty cheerful, I don't even need to think of things to make myself feel OK, but it's still an excellent exercise to break down exactly what is great in one's life so that nothing is taken for granted.  It's also lovely to read what is positive in the lives of our blog friends remind ourselves that we have connected with some fantastically inspirational like-minded souls.

1. I feel that my Post Traumatic Stress Disorder troubles came to a conclusion this week.  In yesterday's post (see below) I talked about how you need to be your own cheerleader and count your blessings.  Not that I'm diminishing depression or other illnesses - I know more than anyone that you can't just 'snap out of it'.  But when that chink of light finally breaks through that pesky black fog you have to lunge for it Ben Stiller slow-mo style and not let it get away.  I'm starting to feel like myself again - just in time for Spring.  And oh look, daffodils!

2. I pledged to not be an armchair activist last week and actually do something for the cause close to my heart - that of protecting the health provisions of sick and premature babies.  Well my charge to battle has happened even quicker than I have expected as I was signed and committed to at least a year long campaign of activism for Bliss, the charity for babies born too soon, too small, too sick.  Sara, the campaign leader has been so brilliant in helping me throw myself in at the deep end and the result is that I'm mid-way through writing a letter to my MP who I already have a scheduled meeting with next week.  How amazing is that?  I think I need to lie down....

3. My beautiful daughter has been making more strides in terms of her speech this week.  You can tell that it is being affected by her hearing problems, but she has it in her to do it.  She seems most intent on learning anything that relates to her getting her belly fed as she crawls up to me angrily waving a bib and a spoon in my face and shouting 'BOWL!' in the cutest little voice that melts my heart but leaves me in no doubt as to the urgency of Babyzoid's demand!!!!

4. Finally, I could write a dozen more reasons (er, possibly) but I have so much to do today that I actually don't have the time!  And that is reason for cheer in itself as I thrive on being busy!!!

Now check out Mich and everyone else's 3 reasons by clicking the badge below.

Reasons to be Cheerful at Mummy From the Heart

Thursday, 17 March 2011

Save the cheerleader! Save your world!

Let me start out by stating that this is not a post about the now defunct Sci-Fi giant that was Heroes - an ode to my same-surname-no-relation fictional friend Claire(bear *shudder*) Bennett.  Nor is it a call to arms for anyone who considers tossing other people in the air to manic techno music Bring It On style a fun leisure pursuit.  Unfortunately I'm not that supple *creeks knee and clicks ankle* No, it's about being your own personal cheerleader. 

Those who still read my blog in spite of all the depressing birth trauma, depression and post-traumatic stress (or maybe because of, you sado-masochists!) will be unaccustomed to seeing me shake my metaphorical pom poms and shout "hey isn't life wonderful?!" Don't get me wrong, I'm not a complete miserable bitch - and if you met me in real life you might think I was a happy friendly sort, if a little shy - unless you caught me in a post diet-coke moment where you might think "whoah, calm down there hyperactive chaotic crazy woman!"  But I have documented my lows on this blog and had lots of kind words and encouragement, but enough is enough.  It's time to start on the upwards trajectory.

I've read many tweets, blog posts and articles lamenting the tragedy that has befallen Japan in the last week or so and I've felt genuine concern for the people who have been affected.  Haven't we all?  Vickie Ford wrote about not wallowing in her post a few days ago and indeed in procrastinating from writing this blog post I came across a relatively new blogger Mammy Dolittle who put into words how I have felt of late.  I too have felt whiny - and ungrateful, and spoiled, and not at all fun to be around.  So enough is enough.  I feel like I am finally drawing a line under the Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - indeed I would say I'm very close to calling myself a PTSD survivor.  I am through with this now.  I've dealt with the birth trauma as much as I can for now, it's always going to be with me, but it no longer controls me with flashbacks and nightmares. 

I'm still suffering a bit of depression, but that I figure is partially job-related, and a lot to do with the fatigue, visual problems and insomnia.  In time I'll be a survivor of that too.  The lovely Mummy From the Heart called me a fighter - and I am.  I'm fighting with my pom poms and a cheer! I'm now going to be thankful for the things I have, at all times, instead of just when I want to join in with 3 reasons to be cheerful - and it starts today.  I have a beautiful daughter who brings so much laughter and joy into my life on a daily basis, a partner and family love me, a nice house in a nice village, a decent standard of living, and so on and so on.  So it really ain't that bad.

So ... gimme a P
        gimme an O
        gimme an S
        gimme an I

ah sod it, way too long and completely cheesy.  Positivity... that's what it's all about.  I'll drink (a diet coke) to that.  Cheers!

Toddler recipe: Chicken and sweet potato mash with barbeque sauce

I've been experimenting again and Babyzoid as ever has been a willing participant. Her absolute favourite meal will always consist of chicken so I've been trying to cook it in different ways and incorporate new flavours into the dishes. So here's my latest offering with a simple homemade barbecue sauce that isn't loaded with sugar and salt like shop bought versions.

Chicken and sweet potato mash with barbeque sauce

Ingredients
  • Half chicken breast or one thigh/leg portion
  • Half a tin of tomatoes or 6 fresh tomatoes, peeled and chopped
  • Worcester sauce
  • Tomato puree
  • 1 tbsp malt vinegar
  • 1 tsp sugar (optional)
  • Handful chopped peppers (fresh or frozen)
  • Half an onion, diced small
  • Olive oil
  • 1 sweet potato, chopped
  • Veggies of choice to serve - I like sweetcorn with this to go with US-style flavours
1. Cook the chicken as you like (I like to put in the oven)
2. Meanwhile, in a saucepan lightly sautee the diced onions in the olive oil.
3. When onions are softened add in the tomatoes.  If using fresh you'll need to soften these also - before adding enough water to create the amount of sauce you need
4. Stir in a tbsp of tomatoe puree (you might want to use more if using fresh tomatoes to strengthen sauce)
5. Add in vinegar, then add in Worcester sauce to taste (again between 1-3 tbsp should be about right)
6. Add in sugar to taste if desired.  Bring to a light boil then simmer.
7. While the sauce is simmering boil the chopped sweet potato until soft enough to mash.  Add a little butter to mash if desired.
8. Boil or steam your veggies.
9. Chop up chicken once cooled and lay on bed of sweet potato mash, adding the veggies before spooning over the sauce.  Any remaining sauce can be refridgerated!

Babyzoid's eyes widened and she let out a massive giggle when she tasted this - but then that's not unusual.  Must admit that I cooked this for us the following night as I was extremely envious!

Let me know if you try it x

Wednesday, 16 March 2011

My Eyes! My Eyes!


The blurred vision started a little over a month ago. I assumed it was a side-effect of the dosage increase of Citalopram but being switched to another type of SSRI didn't help. I simply started having terrible mood swings and panic attacks, so much so that I can actually get pee'd off and start an argument with myself. Then I'll regret being such a bitch and sulk until I buy myself chocolates to make it all better. I'd buy flowers too but then the other half might get suspicious. After all the only other person to never by me flowers is he, so I'm not sure that would do anything but make him feel inadequate, then we'd both be beating ourselves for being rubbish. What am I saying? He's a man, he doesn't do guilt or spiralling self-esteem.

So anyway, the blurry vision is worse if anything and I've been struggling to drive at night or long distance while this has been going on. On a whim I drove myself and Babyzoid round the local villages but I couldn't see the road signs and ended up getting horrendously lost - so much so that I ended up somewhere near Peterborough (I live in Leicestershire). Babyzoid got rather narked at the whole situation and ended up screaming her head off. After finding myself in a traffic jam for half an hour (yep, ended up driving into the town centre) I too ended up screaming and found myself banging my head repeatedly against the steering wheel, much to the worried bemusement of the driver in the next lane at which point I had to pretend to be moshing to my music - kind of difficult to pull off when its Nick Drake solemnly tinkering his accoustic guitar.

When I realised that I'd been having persistent headaches as well and that even when stood still the ground sometimes appeared to be 'breathing' I decided that I had to yet again go trotting off to the Doctors (Munchhausen's paranoia be damned!), so this morning off I went. My lovely Doctor has signed me off again for a month as I'm unable to do the commute or my job properly. I've also been ordered to go see an Opthomologist at Leicester Royal who will see if there's anything amiss as I've already ruled out needing glasses and eye strain. Of course no one's suggested I might be delusional or simply need committing yet...

All of this means unfortunately that I'm going to be unable to drive to my first Bliss campaign meeting in Northamptonshire this Sunday, but I've plenty to be getting on with in that regard, including writing to my MP for reassurances that the Government will honour its commitments to neonatal care. I'm not holding my breath for a response but as quite a determined person (the 1word meme said so) I'll be hunting him down (without weapons!) at his next available constituency surgery. Oh yeah.

An activist is born, even if she is a bit nutzoid!

The Gallery - Trees


I love this tree. I loved it from the moment we looked at our house. Unfortunately it's not actually our tree but the neighbours. As our neighbours, lovely though they are, have a habit of decimating anything green and I often fear for its future. They've pruned it a few times, and each time I see the chainsaw I worry some more. But up to now it survives. It's not just a tree that I love to gaze at out of our bedroom window, along with all the others that I can see into the distance from Burbage common (which is two gardens behind us) but it's also home to lots of wildlife. The birds make a beeline for it when they are in the neighbourhood - and you can see a pair huddling up together in this crude Blackberry snap taken in this morning's mist if you look hard enough. Obviously not an evergreen, but I think it looks as beautiful with its bare swaying branches as it does in its full summer glory.


They also make a lovely background for a photo of Babyzoid enjoying a Sunday play on the swings - won't be long before my little tomboy is climbing them I'll wager!!!!

Tuesday, 15 March 2011

Movie Meme: Week 4 - What's Eating Gilbert Grape?

The topic of the week this time at Metal Mummy's Movie Meme is the Films of Leonardo DiCaprio. This is brilliant for me as he's one of my all time favourite actors. When asked what my favourite film of his would be I'm tempted to go with The Departed, as it's one of the best films I've seen in years. However, I'm going to take the prompt slightly differently and go with what I feel is one of his best performances.


Now we all know he can do brooding, bad boy, suave crim and all the rest of it, but what really alerted me to the fact that he wasn't just a pretty boy who got lucky on the strength of his looks and actually had it in him to become a great actor was his portrayal of the severely mentally handicapped Arnie. His performance was so convincing that had I not seen him in other films already I would have thought he actually was disabled. It is a performance that is completely without vanity - which is all the more impressive considering he was a teenager at the time.

Monday, 14 March 2011

Listography - Retro goodies!

Not sure if anyone else calls them goodies, or even gugoos (perhaps that's just my mother), but the topic at the beautifully refurbished Kates Takes 5's Listography this week is retro sweets.  And who can resist a trip down memory lane when it comes to let's face it, the bestest part of childhood!

1: Dolly Beads!  Always my absolute favourite and I was more often than not accessorised with wrist and neck beads.  Indeed the Beadz part of my name comes from here.  I'm still known as 'Dolly' in some parts too.



2: Double Dip with Swizzle stick! Truth be told, I didn't even really like the fruity fizzy stuff, but I really did love me a Swizzle stick!

 3: Goody lipsticks! These aren't the exact same ones as they weren't 'Love Hearts' branded.  In fact these were simply cheap plastic with that hard candy that nearly all the other sweets were made of in lipstick form.  Don't think it did much in the way of moisturising but I did have a bruise-like purple stain round my mouth afterwards.




4: Black Jacks!  Probably outlawed now in the same way that jam-jar Gollies are, but what is better than exposing black tongue and teeth to a long suffering mum who wants you to look your best for a visit to your Great Aunt's?



5: Texas Bars

Can't for the life of me find an image of these but I seem to remember the wrapper may have been yellowish-orange.  I actually thought I had dreamed these up, but there are others!!!  They remember them too!!!!

And now I'm going to cheat seeing as my number 5 couldn't be illustrated.  Therefore I'm going to have an honourable mention.  Anybody remember these babies?



Now those I REALLY miss!!!

Thanks Kate, this has been fun!  To check out the rest go the the link at the top of my post or in my right hand menu amongst all the other linky badges :D

How Do You Perceive Me? The 1 Word Meme


I'm almost afraid to ask this as I'm not even sure how I see myself at the moment, let alone how others may or may not see me.  However, I have been tagged by the brilliantly blithe Jayne Crammond and the effervescently ebullient newbie Domestic Anarchist (seriously, read her blog - it's hilarious!) so here is the lowdown on what this is all about by the meme originator, the softhearted sweetheart that is Mummy From the Heart:

I was sat on my bed this morning doing my prayers and my mind started to wonder to conversations I have had with online friends recently.  Basically it seems as if there are some people out there who have some very odd (but nice) perceptions of me.  They think things about me that I would never have guessed.  In the last week I have been referred to as super-blogger, uber blogger, ethical blogger, most positive blogger.  All very lovely and have boosted my confidence a good amount but would I ever have guessed people would think such things?  

I am creating a meme, called the 1 Word Meme and I would love for every one of us to be able to collate all the the positive words left by our real life friends, virtual friends and fellow bloggers so that we each have a sheet of positive affirmations to treasure and boost our self-esteem.
So I tag:
Eh up, it's Gemma ;) (translated into Northern)
Um, so yeah, if you want to write a word that describes me, that would be...nice :)
*dives under bed* x

Sunday, 13 March 2011

A visit from the Fairy Hobfather!

Oooh how exciting! I made a comment on Tattie Weasel's blog last week after she was visited by a rather benevolent being who bestowed upon her some delightful choccies and completely forgot all about it.  We were enticed to leave a comment at the end of Tattie's blog if we wished to be visited also.  I made a cheeky request for a day at a luxury health spa but have been promised something even better - a date with one Mr Leonardo DiCaprio!!!! (Ok, the next best thing - DVDs of Gangs of New York and The Aviator).  This is a genius marketing campaign by http://www.appliancesonline.co.uk/blog/ and let's face it, who wouldn't say yes to being sent an incredibly thoughtful pressie when it's not even your birthday? *sideway glance at other half* 

As a communication to mummy bloggers it certainly beats the Daily Mail's approach (Mummy Bloggers Neglect Their Children).

So if you too would like to be visited by someone professing to be a Fairy Godfather *blinks away images of pillow-residing horse heads* then leave a comment below :D

Friday Carnival - Ethics and activism

It was suggested by the lovely Gemma that I enter this week's blogging carnival at Notes From Home as I think I outed myself as a bit of a political animal in the comments section of an excellent blog she wrote.  I faithfully promised that I would do so, though with the impending arrival of my mummy from 'oop norf and another bout of visual disturbance and headaches I said I might struggle with the deadline.  Thankfully I've been given an extension by the lovely Ella, so though this might not be read by as many people as otherwise may have been I still like to honour my promises, in spite of a still pounding head that has seen me AWOL from both blog and Twitter for days!  So, here goes:



It's by now very well documented (by me!) that I gave birth to a premature baby (beautiful Charlotte - pictured above). If it hadn't been for the support of the saintly staff in the High dependency and special care units of Northampton Hospital and George Eliot Hospital, Nuneaton, then I'm not sure I would have gotten through the emotional roller coaster of that time.  And mine isn't the only story - you only have to do a casual search of the Internet and blogosphere to find similar experiences.  Many people will know someone who has given birth prematurely or even full term to a baby that required a stay in the high dependency baby unit.  It's not uncommon and the numbers are rising Two years ago research found that the cost of extra care for premature babies costs the NHS an extra £1billion a year. Admittedly that is a lot of money, but before a certain documentary on BBC2 aired last week, who on earth would have even considered questioning whether or not this money should be spent?  As a so-called civilised society, how can there even be a growing contingent that argues for not resuscitating babies born extremely prematurely?  And if we draw the line at babies born at 23 weeks then what's to stop the threshold being further raised as the economic recovery in this country fails to take off?

It's all a question of money.  Cuts must be made from the NHS budget in spite of a promise to ring fence it in broken election promises, and that is why cases must be made for all the services the NHS operates.  That is why we must argue not to snuff out the lives of the weak before they've even begun just because it costs too much.

And that is why I've decided to do more than simply add my name to the 38 Degrees petition to save the NHS. I've decided to become an activist to speak up for the premature babies who cannot even communicate that they feel pain. The nurses who work on the baby units know how stretched to the limit they already are and that they need more funds, more staff, more equipment to keep NICU and SCBU running adequately - but no one is listening to them. That is why I've decided to join the BLISS campaign to safeguard the budgets for the care of premature babies.  The disgraceful and one-sided 23 Weekers program only strengthened my resolve to give something back and kicked my behind into action. That is why the very next day I made a phone call to the BLISS person in charge of the campaign who said that it would be fantastic if I could be involved.  If I am able I can attend a meeting in Northamptonshire next Sunday (though this will depend on my headache and eyesight).  I've never felt so strongly about anything in my life.  After all, if these budget cuts go ahead unopposed will we be debating the merits of babies being allowed to die if born before 30 weeks gestation?  Babies ruled as not viable if needing expensive heart surgery? Babies who are born Downs Syndrome?

Seriously, where would it end? 

The Friday Club

There are lots of bloggers who are working to bring about change either by blogging about what they believe in or by blogging about what they have done to raise awareness and inspire others. Here are some inspirational posts by some of those bloggers, please click through and read about the fantastic things they are doing:
Merry at Patch of Puddles writes about better buying in Poking a Toe at Off Grid – Buying Better.
Jax at Live Otherwise writes about the Nestle boycott and changing behaviours  in Time for a New Consumerism.
Hannah at Muddling Along Mummy blogs about why she boycotts Nestle in Is it better to do the popular thing or to do the right thing?
Heather at Note from Lapland has a very detailed post about the Nestle boycott in The Nestle Boycott – what’s that all about then?
Hayley at Simply Hayley writes about educating herself about the Nestle boycott in Our household and the Nestle Boycott.
Dara at Readily a Parent writes about the Nestle boycott and other changes in In a Boycotting Kind of Mood.
Rachel at Midlife Singlemum adds her thoughts to the Nestle boycott debate in The Nestle Boycott – Truth or Hysteria?
QWERTYMum discusses positive consumerism in Eggs.
Mama Syder of At Home with Mama Syder writes about rehoming battery hens in Life from The Henhouse.
Kirsty at Imperfect Pages blogs about ethical clothing in An Ethical Epiphany.
Wendy of Inside the Wendy House tells us Why She is a Vegetarian.
Onykahonie of We Don’t Eat Anything with a Face discusses animal welfare in Zoos – The Moral Dilemma.
Jacq of Mymumdom writes about animal welfare in Make Every Animal a Wanted Pet.
Gemma at HelloitsGemma’s Blog tells us about the demonstration she took part in in Strands Together.
Jax at Live Otherwise organised a 100 books challenge to raise money to build a library with Oxfam Unwrapped.
Michelle at Mummy From The Heart writes about taking part in Operation Christmas Child.
Liska at New Mum Online writes about aspartame and asks readers to read and vote with their feet in Aspartame is legal because…?
Ailbh at Who Teaches Whom writes about Passing on my values to my children.
At Tots 100, Christine of Thinly Spread writes about ethical blogging in Blogging Activism: making a difference? and there’s also a survey of parent bloggers about ethical blogging.
Jax at Live Otherwise writes about the sometimes problematic relationship of companies supporting charities for marketing purposes in Charitable Thoughts and about companies using bloggers to advertise their charitable campaigns in Charitising.
Nova at Cherished by Me writes about the power of blogging and social media in making a difference.
Josie at Sleep is for the Weak blogged about her trip to Bangladesh to raise awareness of the Save the Children Blogladesh Campaign in Beauty and Horror: Two Sides to Bangladesh.
Rosie Scribble blogged about her trip to Cameroon to raise awareness of the Pampers and UNICEF vaccination campaign in Pampers, UNICEF and my blogging trip to Africa.
Jules from Curtains For The Window blogged to raise awareness of the many women in poverty stricken areas of the world in Get Lippy! Nazziwa’s Story.
A few bloggers have taken part in the Save The Children Born To campaign. Michelle at Mummy From The Heart writes about what she was born to do in What were you Born to do? It’s a Big Question! and Bod for Tea blogged about the fundraising playdate she had for the Born To campaign in Can a pasta necklace save a child’s life?
Mummy Beadzoid blogs about her involvement in the BLISS charity for premature babies.
Cara at Freckles Family discusses whether we really need a census in Census and Sensibility.
Aspergers, Family Life and Me writes about spreading awareness through the blogosphere about autism in Why Do I Blog?
Looking for Blue Sky tells us why she has set up a special needs group in Meeting people in the real world is important too.
Susie at New Day New Lesson writes about judging each other in The Only Way To Really Understand Something is To Experience It.
And finally Becky from Baby Budgeting gives us a lovely quote to round up these inspirational posts in A hundred years from now it will not matter….

Wednesday, 9 March 2011

The Gallery - Carefree

   Young. Carefree.  Courtship.  Cool. In love. Happy. Memories. Soul mates. 



Tuesday, 8 March 2011

Movie Meme: Week 3 - Martin Scorsese

There are plenty of directors who I admire, though I must confess that I'm not exactly a devotee of any particular one. There are a select few though who will make my ears prick up with interest, these include Tim Burton (as with any self-respecting ex-goth), The Coen Brothers, Ang Lee and Steven Soderberg. I have also enjoyed every Woody Allen film and think he has a wonderful style - you can tell his films a mile off, but I have an ethical problem with him. I know the man is not his art, but still...

I have probably seen most of the Coen Brothers films and I almost decided upon them as I think they've made some of the most original movies of the last 10 years or so. But I wouldn't say they are my favourite directors - that I'll reserve for Martin Scorsese. I realise looking at his filmography on IMDB that I haven't seen half of his films and instantly I want to rectify that, but I probably never will seeing as his directorial debut was in 1959! I have also missed some biggies of his including Gangs of New York as I missed it at the cinema and OH had already seen it when we got together. Unforgivable. But films such as Goodfellas, Cape Fear, Taxi Driver and The Age of Innocence, the latter of which I hadn't realised was Scorsese but was a favourite book of mine by Edith Wharton. His adaptation, that just about manages not to be ruined by Winona Ryder's simpering portrayal of May, shows that he is not merely a great director of gangster films, but is also versatile. Speaking of which he also directed one of the best music films ever made in The Last Waltz. He's also responsible for No Direction Home: Bob Dylan, which I really need to see.

But where I think Scorsese has had a new lease of life in the last few years has been his partnership with Leonardo DiCaprio, one of my favourite actors. OK, I've mentioned I haven't seen Gangs of New York, and I haven't seen Aviator either, but The Departed and Shutter Island I have and they are 2 of my favourite films.

Picture credit: Google images

Don't forget to check out the rest at Metal Mummy's!

Monday, 7 March 2011

Are those undescended testes?

Ever since I decided that I did after all want children I'd always wanted a little girl. Some parents really don't mind what form their beautiful little blessing comes in, as long as it is healthy - and of course health was my number one priority too - especially after a terrible pregnancy. But deep down I really really wanted a little girl. I don't know why as I'd been a right little tomboy as a kid and even though I love clothes and make-up I've never been especially girly - indeed it's rare to catch me wearing anything other than black (even when not depressed), but it was undeniable.

When I was suffering with Hyperemesis Gravidarum, the same condition that killed Charlotte Bronte, I read that women who suffer with the worse sickness often tend to have girls. I didn't dare hope. As long as it's healthy, I would say before I rushed to stick my head down the toilet for the hundreth time that day - on days where I wasn't desperately shrieking "get this parasite out of me!!!!", that is. Yeah, feel pretty bad about that one every now and then but I was really poorly.

To say I was counting down the days to my 20 week scan is an understatement. I had it marked on several calendars and a countdown programmed into my Blackberry. They actually scheduled my scan 2 weeks later than it could have been which added to my impatience, but the day finally came and I was sick with nerves. I had mentally prepared myself for the inevitable "oh look! A willy!" after being told repeatedly by the inlaws "Our family only produces boys!" Oh yeah? Well my family tend to produce female offspring and no I don't want a biology lesson on how it's the little swimmers that decide! My womb is totally inhospitable to male invaders and will spit estrogen torpedos to keep them out, so there!

I nearly cried tears of joy when the sonographer said "it looks like a girl!". They couldn't be sure but the indicators they look for were all there and look, no third leg! "Oh that's fantastic" I said, "But y'know, as long as it's healthy..." He heeeeeee!

Well I don't need to repeat the story of the birth to go into details about how that part didn't go to plan (see My Birth Trauma) but I had my little girl and she was extremely precious. I nursed her through NICU and SCBU, and wept tears of joy every time she overcame another health obstacle she had encountered, and again when I finally got to take her home. And when I finally got to start dressing her in those amazing little outfits I'd been collecting for her for months (especially the mini leather jacket!) oh it was amazing.

So imagine my horror when the Paediatrician at her 6 month check up summoned a load of trainee paediatricians into the room where my little girl was laid, nappyless and tush four sheets to the wind and started prodding her lady bits, muttering scary phrases such as 'undescended testes'. I felt sick to the stomach. "Are you saying that my little girl is actually a little boy?" I managed to mutter through the tears that were starting to form. A load of medical jargon about how testicles don't always 'come down' until months after birth later and me desperately trying to concentrate whilst shoeing thoughts of a (rumoured) hermaphroditic Lady Gaga out of my head and he finally got to the point. No, we don't think Babyzoid is a boy. Please don't worry, he laughed visibly amused.

So I still have my little girl and she is a delight. In my last post Baby 'Hulk' Zoid, I wrote about how she isn't a girly girl and seems to have superhero strength, but her cute little smile and the way she coquettishly cocks her head and bats her eyelashes at her daddy show that the feminine wiles are there underneath the rough and tumble exterior. But every now and then, when she lets out the gruffest belly laugh that would make Barry White sound high pitched, I think back to that paediatric examination and shudder...

Saturday, 5 March 2011

Baby 'Hulk' Zoid

It's true, my little girl has an amazing superhero style strength and I'm ashamed to admit this, especially in the first sentence, but I often lose battles of the brawn with her.

She has always been incredibly strong. When she can't have been much bigger than frog in my belly she was kicking the crap out of me. I of course had pictured her much bigger and ganglier, perhaps having the endless limbs of her Daddy, but realised I had been mistaken once she came out at 27 weeks all puny and sinewy. The nurses at Northampton hospital SCBU had her pegged as a wiful litle madam who could get a right grump on, and they were right. They often used to say that her personality was in evidence from the very first day and there was a whole bevy of nurses requesting to be her slave for the day when she was in quarantine with her infection. Oh how she loved the one-on-one attention. No wonder she got even naughtier once she moved hospitals and had to share a nurse. Oh yes, she had a cheeky personality from day one and nothing has changed. Several people remarked that little 'un had been "on this earth before" and I soon came to agree as she very quickly learned to communicate what she wanted. Even her early cries for milk went "Ungeeeeee! Ungeeee!" which left us in no doubt that she was indeed 'ungry'. Even now, although she still can't talk, she will often crawl up to me carrying one of her food bibs which we keep in the baby unit and angrily wave it in my face, as if to say "Come on! I'm starving! Are you going to feed me or what?" Oh how I envy my SCBU friends whose twins will just wait patiently for whatever comes their way. If I'm so much as 5 minutes late I incur the Babyzoid wrath.

This I suppose I can live with, well until she starts shaking her high chair by the legs like she's morphed into the Incredible Hulk. I keep half expecting to see her skin take on a green hue as she's going "Raaaaaah! Raaaaaah! RAAAAAAAH!". She already holds aloft her walker and throws it across the room, so the high chair is only a matter of time.

I guess it's my own fault for feeding her up so well. Don't get me wrong, I've given her the odd jar when I really can't be bothered, but most of the time I cook her hearty meals that contain a good balance of protein, carb and vegetable. I also do more than I think she'll need as she will often demand a second bowl. Sometimes she'll have dessert and then want more main if she was really impressed. And Babyzoid loves nursery days where she gets 2 lots of breakfast and 2 teas, as well as a cooked dinner. Yes, my little girl loves her food and like Pop Eye with his canned spinach it seems to go straight to her muscles.

Still, at least she shouldn't have any problems in the playground. If her mouth doesn't scare off any would-be bullies I have no doubt in my mind that she will go all hulk on their arses and they'll be tossed Jeff Capes style as if they were a limp piece of celery. Which is fine with me! I always wanted a little girl since we made the decision to try for a baby and I'm so thankful for the gem that I was given, but I don't kid myself that she's a dainty girly girl. I have a feeling that I'll probably be taking her to football matches instead of ballet class and buying her Monster Truck toys instead of Barbies - which is probably a good thing if her violent treatment of her Baby Annabel doll is anything to go by.

Friday, 4 March 2011

Flashback Friday

My wonderful parents and I on a daytrip to Bourton-on-the-water - the Venice of the Cotswolds. OH is the one behind the camera. We hadn't been living in our new home long but it was the first time we'd had the chance to show my parents some of the lovely localish tourist destinations that are only an hours drive away. It was a lovely day out and the weather was pretty ok! Don't I look like my Daddy? :)


Check out the rest at Cafe Bebe's

Thursday, 3 March 2011

30 Day Song Challenge - Day Two (and a half)

I've already done one post combining days one and two but have been tagged by the lovely Vickie Ford so I'm accepting the challenge officially now. Also I notice that there are a few versions of this going around so from now on I'm going with this one. Therefore just to make it even more complicated but to satisfy my completist urges I'm going do a day 2 and a half in today's post as day two differs on this one. That was a boring explanation but I get a bit OCD about stuff like this so I apologise - except I don't because my counsellor told me to stop saying sorry all the time. So there. Deal.

Least favourite song - day 2
Oh gosh, so many contenders. I could wipe out whole genres with my hate wrath bub instead I'll go for Katrina & the Waves - Walking on Sunshine I bloody hate that song, so needlessly chirpy and irritating in every way from her boring non-descript voice to the stupid boppy rhythm, to the cheesy instrumentation. God I hate it. And it get's stuck in your head, in fact it's gonna be stuck in my head all night unless I move on NOW. Right, off to Spotify to play some tunes to rectify the damage!

3 reasons to be cheerful

Well this has been a week of some incredible lows (panic attacks and blurred vision) but although the depression has hit harder than ever there have also been some positives and I like forcing myself to consider them :)

1. I've finally taken the plunge and started to 'zen' my bedroom. I told my OH this before he went to work the other day - what I neglected to tell him was that when he came home half the wallpaper would be missing. He was shocked to put it mildly and thought I should have run that part past him claiming he loved the shabby cheap vanilla coloured wallpaper that is so disgusted with itself it's starting to peel on its own. Pah! I have a project, that makes me happy, and I am totally not consulting OH on colour schemes or anything. Mwah ha ha.

2. I had a reasonable counselling session today and I now understand what is physically occurring when I have a panic attack. The raised blood pressure means that my fear of fainting mid-attack is irrational and so that I should stay and 'fight' the attack, rather than bolting from whatever shop I'm in in a bid to 'take flight'. So bring on the next one - I'm ready for you!

3. OH is off work now for a week so I will get plenty of time to catch up on projects, neglected housework, the zen bedroom project and finally getting some sleep catch up. I may even take a bath with my new Himalayan sea salts. Get me, all Ms relaxation!

4. I had a nice Reiki healing session this week (see a few posts back). I may even do it again!

5. Babyzoid has been full of cuddles and kisses this week and it's been lovely. She's turning into quite the little cuddlebum and I love it.

There, not so difficult after all!

Now check out the rest at Mummy From the Heart:
Reasons to be Cheerful at Mummy From the Heart

Toddler recipe: Chicken and avocado vermicelli in a Thai broth

One of my passions is cooking. I love indulging my creative foodie side by either trying out recipes from the Internet or the many cook books I have, but even more I like trying to create something new. If I searched my creations online I'd probably find dozens of similar recipes but that's not the point. I've created it myself, it counts!

So wanting to give Babyzoid some new nutricious culinary experiences this week and actually having a bit of energy I've been cooking up all manner of treats. At Christmas I actually purchased a web domain with the intention of setting up my own baby and toddler recipe site, but as I'm having to teach myself web design as I go along it's going to be a while before it's up and running. Therefore I'll share a few of them here.

There are a few optional ingredients which enhance the flavour of the broth, but they're not completely necessary if you don't have them in your store cupboard or you don't think paprika is a good idea for your little lamb. Whichever way, it's a nice gentle way to get little 'un to appreciate more exotic tastes.

Chicken and avocado vermicelli in a Thai broth

Ingredients
-Chicken breast or mini fillets
-Olive oil (optional)
-Vermicelli (a spool or 2)
-Half a ripe avocado, chopped
-1/3 to a 1/2 tin coconut milk
-half a lime
-Sprinkle paprika (optional)
-Sprinkle galangal or a bit chopped up if fresh (otional)
-stalk of lemongrass or sprinkle of powdered lemongrass
-A few kaffir lime leaves (optional)

1. cook the chicken. Use a little olive oil if frying, otherwise grill or oven bake. This can be done ahead of time.
2. Heat the coconut milk in saucepan and add the lemongrass, galangal and kaffir lime leaves if using. Simmer, don't boil.
3. At the same time boil the spools of vermicelli in a pan of water. Vermicelli is very thin so it will only take a few minutes. You could use thin white noodles instead.
4.Shred the chicken into the broth and add the chopped up avocado. The avocado should already be soft but will soften in the broth. Can be helped along by mashing into the broth slightly.
5.Once the vermicelli is cooked, drain and add to the broth.
6. Add the juice of the half lime.

This broth is also nice with rice instead of noodles and depending on the quantites you use it can be good for a couple of meals as it heats up nicely (no bad tummy from Babyzoid at least!)

Babyzoid yummed her way through it and polished off the lot - twice - which scuppered my plans as I was going to eat it if she didn't!!!

Wednesday, 2 March 2011

Movie Meme: Week 2 - Angels With Dirty Faces

I've always loved gangster films. The Godfather, Goodfellas, The Usual Suspects, A Bronx Tale and The Departed are amongst my favourites. But possibly my favourite gangster movie of all time is a black and white film I caught on TV one lazy afternoon that soon had me gripped.


James Cagney looked like a funny little man, he talked like a funny little man, but in this film he gave the most menacing performance of a bad to the bone gangster that I've ever watched - and that includes the amazing career-high's from the likes of De Niro and Pacino.

Ok, the way Rocky (Cagney) shot his pistol in that rigid pole-up-his-back manner looks kind of funny in this day and age but it doesn't hinder once you get used to the stylistic differences of a movie made in 1938.

As with all best gangster movies it's not reliant on just the central anti-hero. Pat O'Brien as Jerry the priest who had been boyhood friends with Rocky and would have also probably lived a life of crime if he hadn't been able to run faster than Rocky when they were caught committing crime is an excellent kindly figure who wants the young boys in his care (the angels with dirty faces) to avoid the life that he and Rocky lived. Humphrey Bogart also crops up as the crooked lawyer who plots to kill Jerry to prevent him revealing damaging information.

Angels with Dirty Faces is a gangster movie with depth and without giving the ending away, you are satisfied even if you aren't entirely sure whether Rocky is redeeming himself or not with the films final act. Not just a great black and white film, but a great film that stands up to any in the gangster genre made since.

Now check out the rest of the films at Metal Mummy's!

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